You Know the Famous Duck – Calm on top – Fury underwater? – WELL I MET THAT DUCK TODAY

Recently I learned a stunning fact about many of my clients, which I didn’t previously understand.

Take, for example, Pete (not a real name).

Pete was referred to me by a family member. Pete held a valid full class 5 license and had completed an entire driving school theory.

For two sessions, Pete drove me everywhere I requested, without any hesitation.

After establishing a casual relationship, we started to have more open conversations allowing me to finally ask…

So you are doing everything required to be a safe driver, and you have shown me everything I have asked with great skills – presented a very skilled driver. So why are you paying me for more training?” I asked.

“I hate driving!” Pete quietly states.

“I hate driving!” Pete quietly states.

I took the time to carefully explain his accurate skills. This was my viewpoint from my side of the issue called I HATE DRIVING.

Pete, what do you see from your side of this problem I HATE DRIVING ,from your point of view?

Maybe together, we can compare viewpoints and come up with some different perspectives to help.

And then came the amazing part …

I took the course with xxx, and in each driving class, I was terrified, never knowing what they would make me do. I did whatever they asked, even driving on the highways at 90 plus, horrified the entire time. Each session was total fear for me.”

I did it because, well, the family suggested that it was important, an important skill and important for emergencies.”

So I asked, what level of stress do you drive with? These last two lessons, what level of anxiety stress were you going at? Say 10 is blinding stress, hard to see, certain death at the doorstep any second away. Say 0 level is you are totally relaxed, asleep.

Pete said 5 or 6 most of the time, and when we were downtown that one time in three lanes of traffic I was at 8 or 9.

WOW, I was stunned. Well, you certainly fooled me. I had no idea! Thank you for being so honest and disclosing your side of the issue we both are looking at…. Totally a different story from what I have been watching for the last two sessions. WOW! YOU FOOLED ME!

So together we came up with a new goal.

Drive calm at levels 1 or 2 maximum. This is the new measurement of Pete’s good driving. No more 8 or 9’s.

Drive calm at levels 1 or 2 maximum. This is the new measurement of Pete’s good driving. No more 8 or 9’s.

We spent one session parking, very calm, low traffic, relaxed, no rush session. We stayed 1 or 2 and laughed some and simply played with the car going slow. Pete recommended this.

We then spent a couple more sessions in some expensive residential areas with big fat roads, near-zero traffic, beautiful trees, gorgeous homes, and some very tricky signs but low volume traffic. Pete liked this calmer environment.

After repeating this a few times, Pete relaxed more and started to talk about the nice feeling of the tires on the road. He also stated that he was thinking about taking the family car out to drive.

My instruction stopped totally. I stopped teaching once I learned that Pete had super high anxiety, secretly. It was clearly time to follow Pete.

The lead needed to be Pete. Pete decided what he needed to do to operate at a calm 2 or 1. Peter already has the skills to perform all the driving tasks safely. But the joy, the pleasure, the enjoyment along the learning path had been robbed from his experiences.

No one should be driving at anxiety levels 7,8 or 9. It’s not healthy. It is a massive internal stressor that is a dangerous practice when driving. Driving is stressful enough on its own without you carrying high internal stress.

So now Pete is on his own learning path. A path he knows very well with all the skills to drive anywhere he chooses. But this time around, Pete will slowly teach himself to go places at calm levels 2 or 1 at his own pace and own speeds. And as his enjoyment grows he will move further and further into the magnificent driving world, at his own path.

No more forced learning.

The once hidden internal stress is no more.

I hate driving now has a new friend, called A Little Bit of Fun.

best of luck to you Pete.

You are well on your way to Calm Driving, if you so choose.

I Have Evolved.

Quality Driver Training.

A Vancouver Calm Driving Service.

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STATEMENT OF LIMITATION

Materials presented here are for education purposes only referencing two ICBC materials,Tuning Up Drivers Manual, Learn To Drive Right Manual, training material from the 3 week Driving Instructors Licensing Program and amterials from the GLP classroom certificate Program.

IHaveEvolved.com and Todd Cooper are not responsible for any consequences that may result from use of this material. Throughout these posts references are made to acts and regulations that govern driving in British Columbia.

In the event of a difference between the material here and any of these acts or regulations, the acts and regulations shall apply. For specifc help related to these acts please refer to a professional lawyer or a police office.